Oh my goodness! It's finally Christmas break!!!

I think I've said 5,000 times in the last month "I can't wait for Christmas time" and it's finally here! 

This semester was a whirlwind, to say the very least. There were high highs and low lows. One thing I'm slowly learning about myself is that I am my own worst critic. Nine times out of ten, I'm harder on myself than anyone else. Maybe that's just the perfectionist in me, but that and nursing school don't mix. Still a work in progress.

So, last time I checked in was on fall break, and needless to say a lot has happened since then. I've had exams, care plans, papers, presentations, you know.. the everything you can imagine.

Let's start with care plans! This semester we had verbal care plans. So instead of typing everything out and submitting online, we had everything typed out and delivered it verbally to our professors. Terrifying at first, yes. Worth it in the end, yes.

The positives of verbal care plan: IMMEDIATE feedback. You know right away how you did, whether you passed/failed, and whether the instructors were pleased. Back to first semester (ugh, sigh, shoot me, couldn't make me go back if you gave me a hundred dollars....), I remember I didn't get my care plan back for like five weeks. Five agonizing weeks that I cried every day concerned about how I did on it. So this is a BIG positive. Also, you have the chance to clarify anything that didn't seem clear to the professors. And lastly, there's no drug sheet... and all nursing students say amen. We needed to know why were giving the drug, but didn't need to know every little detail. These three points are true for both my Peds and OB care plan, but for the Peds care plan we didn't have to do a health history either!

Now on to the negatives of verbal care plan: ANXIETY. Holy anxiety. I was so incredibly nervous for both it was unreal. I had my Pediatrics one first and it was just my professor and I sitting in the nurses station of the Emergency Room... so laid back! I remember as soon as I finished my first words were, "Did I do alright?" And thankfully, her answer was "absolutely!" Little did I know, that would be a baby care plan compared to my OB care plan. So my first one I was nervous because I had never done one, and the second one I was nervous because there was SO much stuff included and they have the right to ask any questions to clarify. So on the next negative... they can ask anything. You have to know your stuff.

Peds care plan was pretty simple. We gave report and gave our care plan (only three diagnoses!) For OB.. we gave report on our patient, had a health history, a ten minute assessment, a nutrition assessment, culture assessment, and then our actual care plan. A LOT. I think I worked about three weeks, and the best thing... they loved it! After giving report, no one said anything... and I didn't know what to do. Next thing I know, they started raving about it. Said it was the best report they had heard, and then... they said the same thing about my nutrition and write up! I hadn't even made it to my care plan yet and I was beaming. I had seven diagnoses and they chose my last one listed in priority order. It wasn't my strongest, but they still loved it. They ended up requesting a copy of my entire care plan, all pieces included, and I gladly handed it over! I walked out of that office feeling so happy and so proud of myself. This was one of those high-highs. There's something so rewarding about working so incredibly hard for something, and it paying off. So as far as care plans go, this semester was a success!

For grades, my third and fourth OB exams I made As. And for Peds, my second exam I made an A, and my third exam I made a B. In my Professional Practice class I made an A on both my paper and presentation. For finals, I made an A on my OB final and a B on my Peds final.

The last stressful thing on the nursing school agenda this semester was taking my two ATI exams. We had an ATI exam for both OB and Peds. I can't exactly describe how stressful these both were, being pass/fail exams with only about 8 days apart with two finals in the mix. Long story short... I made level three on both! Level three is the highest you can get, definitely another high :)

The best part of it all... I finished the semester with a 4.0! I couldn't be happier!!! It was so so tough!

p.s. shout-out to Hillsong United for their song "Oceans" that I listened to before every single exam/care plan this semester. And most importantly, I'm forever thankful for the reason behind the song, my loving Savior who can bring peace in all circumstances.

Level four is known to be the toughest semester thus far, even though I don't know how that can be possible. Taking it one day at a time and excited to enjoy my Christmas break! Dosage exam first day back, so gotta study up a few days prior :)

Merry Christmas eve eve eve!

Where has the time gone!

One second I'm blogging about the first week of school and now we're to midterms. This semester has been full. Not chaotic yet but very full. 

So far this semester we have been checked off on urinary catheter and IV insertion, we've had two OB exams and one Peds exam, some random projects/papers for a professionals class, Simulation, and I just finished my Pediatrics clinical and first verbal care plan.

Starting with check offs... they were a little rocky this semester. Catheter went perfectly, IV not to perfect. I forgot to take the tourniquet off at the correct time. But thankfully on round two everything went perfectly and I could move on!

Exams this semester have been tough, but manageable. First OB exam I made an A, second a B. And my first Peds exam I made an A. So far, so good. But there's a lot more material to be covered in a short amount of time.

Pediatrics clinical has been incredible. Going into this semester I was so afraid that my emotions would take over and being around sick kids would be too much. The only reason I was afraid was because I placed all of my eggs into my pediatrics basket. This is all I had dreamed of doing after nursing school. After my first 12 hour shift, I knew I could do it, and that I thoroughly enjoyed being with kids just like I had imagined. Speaking of 12 hours, those are long, and hard. Props to all nurses who do them, because by the end of every clinical all I want to do is crawl into bed and not wake up for at least 12 more hours. This clinical rotation has taught me so much. I've learned some of life's greatest lessons from a six year old. Kids are so resilient, so fearless, so strong. Pediatrics is unlike any other, and I can't wait to plant my roots here one day. I'm so blessed by this rotation and am sad to be moving on, but I'm now on my way to Labor & Delivery clinicals.

Coming up this semester: We have two more OB exams, two more Peds exams, a professionals paper and presentation, OB ATI exam, Peds ATI exam, OB final, Peds final, and OB care plan. Whew! That's a lot to fit into less than two months.

Here's to staying half-way sane and finishing the semester strong! 

XOXO, Bailey

 Summer has come and gone and I'm not quite over it yet! I feel that it's only appropriate to recap this incredible summer before we head back to school!
Where to begin...

We spent lots of time at the pool...

I spent nights out in different cities... always fun!

We watched some beautiful sunsets

 and spent lots of time with this wild one

I went to a few concerts

And I can't forget this incredible trip to NYC to celebrate my 21st birthday

to see part one, click here

for part two, click here

for part three, click here

I also spent a few special days on the lake. These are always some of my favorite!

So, that's a super summarized version of my summer! Relaxation, good times, good people, lake days, pool days, new cities, and memories I will never forget. Summer of 2016 will forever go down as one of my favorites. Now, time for more Nursing School.

xoxo, Bailey

"We are so afraid to change careers, to end relationships, to outgrow people or places -- and that's just growth. To me, choosing to go toward the cracking in order to keep expanding is the only way. The only way to get out of pain is to go through it. Pain is information." - Sophia Bush

Seasonal people.

We've all heard the term. That some people are meant to stand by you for a lifetime, while others are only around for a season. It's not always someone's fault; sometimes things just don't work out despite your best efforts. I'm a firm believer that each and every person placed into our lives is there for a reason. God has a purpose behind every single person and why you crossed paths. And although everyone has a purpose, not everyone is meant to stay.

Personally, I'm a fighter. I will fight for someone that I care about for far longer than I should. I give entirely too many second chances, and always try to give the benefit of the doubt to the people I care most about.  On the same token, I am not one to get walked over. Have I let a guy or an old friend do that to me in the past? Yes. Did I learn? Absolutely. Have I learned to stand up for myself since then? You know it. Which ultimately is leading me to this post. But what's the next step when the support, emotions, and feelings are not being reciprocated? What do you do when these people are inhibiting your growth as an individual?

I've burned bridges, cut ties, and tried to let certain people fade out of my life. But it doesn't get easier.  It doesn't get easier to force a relationship to end. And breakups with friends can be even harder than a love interest. This is something I am currently struggling with accepting. There are certain people that you will cling to and get comfortable with, making things even more difficult when you have to part ways.

Haven't we all been accused of "giving up" on a friendship? Those are never easy words to hear. But is it really giving up when you've been holding it together by yourself for the longest time? Friendship is a two way street and if the support is not being reciprocated, it becomes more of a stressor rather than a stress reliever. Friendship should be fun. It should be easy (at least most of the time). They should help you solve your problems, not repeatedly cause you more.
Seasonal people.

Why have I let someone that has hurt me over and over again come back into my life year after year? A person that doesn't want me, but doesn't want anyone else to have me. I don't know if I have allowed this because I too have been unsure of what I wanted, or if I cared so much that I would rather have him halfway rather than not at all.

 "The best advice my mother ever gave me was - let him find someone else to teach him what he wants."

Seeing someone once a year isn't sweet. It's a tease. A mind game. Something that I don't have time for any more. I want so badly for the person in my mind to be the person in front of me. But it just isn't that way. My expectations are not my reality. I know God has the perfect man waiting on me. He is saving him for the perfect time, and I cannot wait for the day that we meet.

 "Believe it or not, sometimes 'proving your worth' means leaving people who won't appreciate it, the hell alone. How can you prove you're worth more by stressing yourself settling for less? They see your worth already. They just don't value it." - Horacio Jones

I know I'm not growing with these individuals, nor am I becoming a better person. My life isn't easier because of them, rather it is more stressful. I have a number of individuals that I need to cut ties with for myself. As easy as it would be to keep doing what I've been doing for years, I would be continuing the habit of not putting myself first.

"The hardest part was to stop fighting, to stop trying to glue the broken pieces back together and just walk away. I mean, how do you just let go of someone you spent so long desperately holding on to?" - Jess Amelia

Seasonal people.
It's time for me to put myself first. My mindset, my health, and my happiness back at the top.
That time is now.